Back as promised!

I have been reviewing life, in part, to remember where I've been and how I got to be who I am.  Sometimes I marvel at all that I've done in 53 years, and other times I marvel at how little I've accomplished!  If  spent as much time on writing as on watching tv or playing word games, I would have been able to write enough for an encyclopedia.  (If you're old enough you probably hear Jiminy Cricket singing right now).  I would probably have  been a published author many times over!

I always thought that someday I would write a book.  When I was in college, I said something about writing a book to a group of friends.  Someone said, "You and everybody else".  I was a little taken aback and insulted by that comment, but it made me think about how commonplace the thought of publishing was in that circle.  It made me wonder if that book was just a silly idea, or if I ever would have anything to say.  You'd think t would have made me feel emboldened to think things like "I'll show you!"  But motivation doesn't usually come from the need for revenge for me. Being belittled just make me feel...little  and I think thing like "who do you think you are to think you can write a book?"

So, while this isn't a book, it's an opportunity to write and find a voice and say what I need to say.

I had been reviewing past employment experiences. I've touched on the bad and the ugly, so now I want to focus on the good, the really good and the best work experiences I have had.

Almost all jobs are terrifying at first.  You have to get to know a new environment, new people including a new boss, new procedures, and new office politics.  (Oh yeah.  Office politics are everywhere. )

After the initial shock and subsequent settling in period, the first couple of years are pretty good as long as the place is fairly functional.  My first job as an undergraduate was a a hospital psychiatric technician.  This job was one step above babysitter in terms of using clinical skills.  We spent a lot of time sitting in the day room or in "constant observation " or CO.  CO was sitting outside the door of a patient who was a suicide or runaway risk.  If you were lucky, the patient would actually talk to you, but mostly they either slept or just generally ignored you.  The kids on CO were usually hostile and the adults were either actively psychotic, embarrassed or annoyed.  It didn't help that I was all of 22 and looked about 14.  Some of the teenaged boys would ask me out because I didn't seem like an authority figure ti them!  The adult just didn't take me seriously.

The psychotic patients were the most interesting. I suspect that some of the older people were actually showing symptoms of alzheimer's or some other form of dementia.  Once a very nice refined older lady politely asked me to write a letter for her.  She began her dictating with a formal salutation of "Dear Hosptal Administration".  From there is got pretty angry and a little personal.  She asked my name than went to dictate, "Amy is the stupidest meanest Fucking Ass Bitch nurse in the whole hospital".  then added a "sincerely yours" to her signature.  She then called be dear, patted my hand and politely asked me to mail it for her.  After such a glowing recommendation what could I say except "Of course!"...when monkeys  fly out of my butt, I'll get right on that.

Another older man asked to kiss my cheek and then wanted me to show him what was between my legs.  Didn't wear too many dresses to work while he was a patient there.

But for every lunatic moment, there were opportunities to talk with kids about the cruddy home lives or past abuses.  There were group therapy sessions to observe, and the nurses and other techs became good friends.  Sometimes there were "out trips" for the kids who were having some success in the program.  Most of the nurses hated these trips because they were outside of normal scheduled hour,s but I loved them!  They were usually trips to the movies or the theater and, even though I was working by supervising, it was just fun to me.

After two years, and no prospect of moving into any more money from here, I decided to head to graduate school in Michigan.  I think too years is just the right amount of time to be in a job before chinks in the facade start to be more obvious.  As it was, I left feeling sad to leave behind my friends and colleagues to pursue bigger and better things+

This was the last time I would ever live in Missouri.

But this another chapter in life so it'll be for another blog