Academics

Obviously the main thing I remember about high school is the academics.  Okay, that's a lie...

If I do remember a class it was either that I was  terrible at it and hated it, or because I loved the teacher.  I used to think the math part of my brain was missing.  Now I usually say I don't do math because I chose to use my limited IQ points to do something useful instead.  Those math teachers who tell you  that you will use the school brand of math are full of it.  Unless you are going to be an engineer or someone who does something mathy, you don't.  God invented calculators, and the only math I consistently do in my head is percentages.  You gotta know what to tip, and if 30% off puts the cost of a sweater  into your budget.  Otherwise, it has not been useful for me.  Besides, all the math classes at my school were taught by coaches.  I did not like calling my teachers "Coach".  They weren't MY coach! 

So algebra and geometry were largely a waste and just served to lower my GPA.  I also had a coach for one of my history classes.  What I most remember about him was that a kid actually lit up a joint in one of his classes.  I was not in that class and it may have been an urban legend, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was true.  I like history enough that despite my refusal to call the teacher "Coach", I did okay in that class. 

Here is a very surprising thing.  I aced economics/  I know that I did better than almost anyone, because I got to go to some economics seminar to observe along  with the other kids who did well in that class.  I only did well because it was 99% (Ah! A percentage!) memorization and I was good at memorizing and spitting out what I memorized. Fortunately, my fiend, Martin, went to that seminar, too, and we spent the whole tie playing tic tac toe and dots. 

I also had a great history class my senior year.  We didn't have AP (advanced placement) classes, then but there were a few classes that you had to have certain GPA's to get in.  So I got to be in advanced American History.  The teacher for this class had a PhD in something like medieval religions.  He would sometimes dress like a Calvinaist Minister to tell as we all were predestined to end up in Heaven or Hell.  If we were predestined for Hell there wasn't much you could do about it, but if you were destined to Heaven you had to keep your nose clean or you would go to Hell anyway.  I guess you really didn't know what would piss God off, so you had to be perfect.  Maybe this particular idea was why Calvinism didn't last.  People would make one mistake and say "Screw it!  I'm going to Hell anyway, so I may as well have fun in the meantime!"

  Doc Robert's (the teacher) was pretty irreverent, but I actually think I learned some things in that class.  I had him for sociology, too.  Most of our grade was based on whether we could come out ahead in our fake  marriage.  We had to partner up,  then you and your faux spouse had to decide how to manage your starter money that you were given according to  roll of the dice.  This is actually a lot like life.  Your start in life is a crap shoot.  You could be foolish and spend all your money on a fancy car or an extravagant wardrobe, or you could get insured, invest, save, go to college...Then you had to spin the wheel of fortune.  You may get in a fiery car crash or have triplets or be robbed.  Your grade was based on whether you got through whatever and still be in the black.  It sounds like a no-brainer, but some kids actually failed because of stupid decisions.  Teenaged brains are wired to override everything but enjoyment.  Some kids couldn't even resist fantasy enjoyment.

My music classes were the ones I enjoyed the most, of course, and I think they deserve a separate blog. 

Otherwise, memorable things include passing note with BJ in College Prep English(I still have some of them and we were just CRASS!) and having to square dance as part of PE.  For some reason, the PE teacher really liked me, so I actually did well in her class even though, even then, I was lucky to walk without scraping my knuckles on the floor.

Next time I will tell you about my music teachers..